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THE CAPTAIN'S LOG
1:42 AM -- 2004-02-14
Here I am.... almost 2 hours into the day sanctioned for love, and entertaining thoughts of a first love. A love I questioned for years after its passing. Not until now do I see things differently. Reality is only in perception. And if at that time did I perceive it to be love, then it was so. To question too much after the fact is futile. Analyzation completely deromanticizes things. Don't go checking your dictionaries for the word.. it wont be there. Deromanticizing is mine. Analyzation is best used for things you believe in and things you know, not things you've done. Leave those things beautiful, unmaimed by autopsy. I haven't spoken to the man for years... I only knew him as a boy, but I'm convinced the time we spent together will forever change my life. I don't know how much attribution you should get, or how much you deserve at all. I'll give you a spot, maybe a paragraph in the memoirs. The second love of my life is much more romantic, as I left it where it lie.. frozen still in the january snow. A storybook love within my head, as the imagination is more powerful than nonfiction. Never had I fallen so deeply so quick, because although I didn't know it, we had very little time. I didn't know I needed to skip shit like flirting and the parry and joust of courtship. C'est la vie, it flew away as quickly as it appeared. Paul Simon will never sound to anyone quite like my ears hear it. But what the fuck do I know? I'm 19 fucking years old for chrissake. Love-soaked rhetoric does not become me. And I get mad when people try to liken their trivial experiences to mine. I've become as pompous and self righteous as the following sentence depicts. "No one has loved as I've loved. No one has broken as I've broken." Whatever, I'm an ass. Happy Valentine's Day... but don't buy anything. Lord knows we can't buy into the holiday of the dollar. (you know I couldn't get through this without a jab at the folly of society.) The Ninja, is signing off.. Sa Da Tay! Miss a Direction?: NYC kicks some serious ass. - 2007-02-26 bits n pieces 1 - 2007-02-10 Bowling for Bullshit. - 2007-01-22 Just a page break - 2007-01-14 Three weeks of fun, but only two can be gauged in such a short time window - 2006-11-07 |